MOM's DREAM

Date: 12/08/2007 07:38

Dennis and I took a load of yard debris to the dump first thing this
morning. Arriving at Dad and Mom's we discovered Sean picking up the
mess that the night marauders had left. They ripped open garbage bags,
stole the donations for the Retarded Citizens, and made a huge mess.
Discovering some bank and credit union statements on the sidewalk, I
immediately tried to contact both institutions to notify them of
possible fraud.

Meanwhile, on hold for more than 10 minutes, I used Dad's cell to call
Dotty to see when she and Forrest were coming. While speaking with her,
the bank FINALLY answered, and I dropped the phone which disconnected.
Well, that was the first straw that broke the camel's back. I just
broke down and felt totally overwhelmed.

Long story short, I finally reached the US Bank Fraud division to put a
hold on their checking, change the VISA number, and contacted the
credit union. The credit union assured me that no one can access the
account without the card and the pin. More tears talking to the bank
people, but they were very understanding and patient. I know they have
dealt with upset people before, so kudos to US Bank for being so
understanding.

Meanwhile, Dennis and Sean loaded up the truck. We got two loads of
donations off to ARC today, and Dennis and Sean drove another load to
the dump. I had hauled 3 boxes of Dad's carvings out to the curb. Up
until this a.m. I would have never considered doing that. However, I
had gone downstairs with Steffan as he wanted to show me that he was
making his place neat. (I was shocked; it looked okay.) Getting back
upstairs, I walked through what used to be Dad's shop and saw ...
hundreds? of boxes filled with his projects. Okay, that was
overwhelming. So you can see why I figured he wouldn't miss 3 boxes.

Well, I wasn't quick enough. Dad walked around the corner of the house,
opened the lid on the boxes, and hauled them back to the porch. I just
sobbed, Dad felt bad, and I told him I didn't want to hurt his
feelings, but we HAVE to get this place clean. (By the way, I am
getting sick of this crying business.)

Dad had told me I could just take out the boxed up stuff, but it looks
like that doesn't mean his projects. More on that later.

Forrest and Shayla were a great help today. Forrest, Dennis, and Sean
carried out three full cabinets of video tapes. We have almost emptied
a 6 foot book case partially blocking the front door. Shayla helped
fill garbage bags, entertain Mom, pack donation boxes, and organize
Dad's tools.

We hauled countless dead plants out of the house. We are trying to
consolidate Dad's woodworking tools into the area where the indoor
jungle was filled with dead plants. Anything with a Goodwill sticker
goes right into the donations boxes.

I emptied a three drawer dresser in the living room. Two drawers filled
with old clothes. One drawer filled with candles. Every single candle
is being removed from the house. One drawer, when I tried to open it,
was so stuffed the handle broke off.

I want to point out, again, that no treasures are being sent away. We
are finding full boxes of stuff bought at Goodwill. The stench of cat
urine and feces is everywhere; it is the most depressing place in the
world right now. Thank goodness no one is dead.

Dad is most appreciative, he is just overwhelmed. He thanked us both
today when we talked to him in the late afternoon. Dennis said
something like, 'well, it just kind of got away from you,' and Dad
agreed and said he was so sorry we had to do this. We assured him that
we wanted to, and everything will be okay in the long run.

When Dennis and I left today, our truck was loaded with junk for the
dump. The only things we left on the sidewalk were some empty cabinets
and a broken plant stand and a shaky chair. The front porch is loaded
up with stuff again, but blocked off with lattice so that the local
no-goods won't make a mess again.

We'll go over again tomorrow. Forrest will be there, Sean will be
there, Steffan tries to keep out of the way. This is very unsettling
for him, but I'm trying to make him understand that this is to keep
everyone safe. He said, "Why don't you just take all this stuff to your
house?" I replied, "Steffan, I can't live like this. I need to feel
safe and know that if my house ever catches on fire I can get out
safely. I have to live in a clean place. This will be better."
"Sterile?" "No, Steffan, clean and safe."

Shayla may or may not be able to come again tomorrow (or the next day),
but she's such a great help and has promised to come back, so that is
another weight lifted.

I feel horrible that Dotty overdid it with her back yesterday. The
great news is that she got two of the kitties off to (most likely) good
homes and has appointments set up to neuter the remaining animals.

We reclaimed NO rooms today, but we can now move through the front
door, through the living room, and into the dining room. We almost have
aisles that you can walk through without turning sideways. I told
Shayla that one of us must have a big butt, because there were times
today that both of us weren't fitting into the same aisle!

While cleaning the living room, Dad saw me put some yard thing into a
box. He said, "You known, your Mamma really...." and I said, "Dad, I am
so sorry, but I just HAVE to do this. This place has to be safe. You
have to be able to move around in here. If Mom gets upset, have her
yell at me. I'm not doing this to be mean, but I HAVE to do
this...please."

The good thing is that Mom and Dad are to the point where 'if there's
anything you kids want, you're welcome to it.' Mom's doing okay, her
back pain has her laying in bed with a vibrator on her back, listening
to her books on tape. She was dressed and got up and walked out to the
back porch for a few minutes today. Dad is doing a great job organizing
her meds, catering to her every whim, getting us boxes and bottled
water, and trying to do the best he can. He made Mom mush with fresh
blueberries today, and Dotty had sent over some food.

I had him clean some more old magazines off of his book cases in the
bedroom today. I told him that to keep this handful of woodworking
books, he would have to get rid of something. That worked okay.

We taped the family phone list up on the wall. I doubt Dad will call
any of you, but when you have the time, please call them.

Mom really loved getting to visit with Shayla today. I guess the last
time Shayla had been to the house was when she was six, so the
condition was probably quite a shock to her. A week ago I had only been
in the kitchen and had no idea how the situation has escalated. We are
taking down hanging blankets between the rooms. I told Dad that we
can't just block off stuff any more, because once it's hidden, it's
forgotten.

When we finally get this place emptied, we will need to get it cleaned
- somehow - and my dream would be to get it painted, carpets ripped
out, and get them some decent CLEAN furniture. But, this is way down
the pike.

Thanks for letting me relate this. I can not carry it inside.

Love,
Daphne

PS: Laird; Mom dreamed about you night before last.